cocaine, yola, soft, piff…
ive been in love with this bitch for the last 8 years of my life. we have a great relationship when we see each other on a limited basis, but i seek her out like a sick woman who goes back to the man who beats her day after day. i come crawling back on my hands and knees give her my last dollar and promise her more if she will just give me some now.
its ruined my life and soured more than enough of my relationships. i went through a period where i wouldnt kick it with people who didnt have it or couldnt get it. ive sold it to get enough money for more. ive done crazy shit for it. ive stolen money. ive made up stories that i lost money. i lied. ive mixed her with norco, ecstacy, somas, oxycontin for that speedballin effect. ive stayed up days with her.
ive been a “functioning” member of society going to work everyday all the while slipping into the bathroom to rendevous with her.
i hate her but yet shes the first thing on my mind every morning even if i havent touched her for months. i want her. i need her.
ive been to rehab and tried to quit her. only to get upset and know that shes the one that i can count on for immediate comfort. immediate attention.
what is it in me that NEEDS this numbing agent to make it through the days, weeks, months?
stay tuned and you’ll see…..
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welcome to blogging!!!! i’m so glad you’ve started; you will find writing about it and the feedback it generates will help you in your self-examination as yout struggle with your addiction. it’s a bitch but you and i know you will overcome.
hey, i know her. that bitch numbs the pain. her feeling is so comforting that you really DO forget the hurt for the short time you are high. her embrace is so warm and welcoming. she makes you analyze music, endlessly surf the net, she makes you SO horny, she goes great with beer, and shes the perfect party host.
but she’ll ruin your life if you let her. she may even kill you.
thats a cold bitch right there.