somehow though, it just seems right. we both deal with remnants of shattered dreams and hopes of our pasts and at first i felt i was just an escape from lonesomeness i dont feel i could just be that. there is more. it’s unspoken on my part and shown through actions on his.
down, even to the way he touches me.
how i can give into what he wants even though my own head has always played back incredibly pain filled memories because he calmly reassures me that he’s right there and wont hurt me.
ive heard that before, many times, but with him, i actually believe it.
ive always been a passive lover. in this ive always felt used and apart from the acts. with him my passivity and submission is not taken from me ungratefully. i wouldnt want to be with a man who isnt domineering, i want a man in my bed and my LIFE.
im laying wrapped up in sheets and covers that play back our last few nights together, my incredible gift of his sacrifice to spend time and effort to see me and im almost choked up at how much i miss him right now. how much i will miss his scent when it wears off the bed and for the next few months that i wont see him.
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